Sparks on the dog
I used to write a lot of words about playing experiences I've had. I'd try to capture the magic, in words, of a thing that is so ephemeral and indescribable that often I would feel that the result was a mere skeletal description of something living, with flesh and bone and blood. A performance that takes us all on a journey, with each audience member going to a different place, a different star system, a different sadness, a different joy.
The Buddhists say there are ten billion worlds right here, and we inhabit each one at various times, and the worlds are inhabited by billions of souls in various guises and disguises.
Tonight when I was trying to fall asleep after playing a particularly exhilarating performance for an evolved crowd of beautifully alive people, I noticed that I could see sparks coming off of my little dog's body.
Then I turned to my sleeping life partner, and I could see her breath as a blue mist.
I held up my right hand, and saw a blue fire burning around it, with occasional sparks shooting off of it.
I was not surprised. I was reassured. This is a phenomenon that I had seen all through my youth and one that I even think I can explain. I believe it's chi. Orgone energy. The life force in a very active state. I believe that to see it, you must have some sort of core health, and so I was pleased to see it again after several years.
The light show went on and on. Sparks, cool blue flames, and occasional other various fireworks, there in the bed, in the dark.
Some scientists and most doctors of allopathic medicine call this "subjective light phenomena", meaning it's only you and your imaginative eyeballs that see it. It doesn't exist in real time.
Anyone who has seen the Orgone or chi knows that it is real, because it behaves in ways that are somewhat predictable. It's almost absent when the energy is low, or the room is "dead". You won't see it as well on cloudy days as you do on sunny ones. Yes, you can see it as pulsating waves, particularly early in the morning, on a sunny day. You can also see swarms of spots and spheres and squiggly lines (Krieselwelle) that are hard to ignore.
Our culture has little patience with people who see things that "aren't there". But many of us believe they are there. We grew up seeing these light shows. We read about them in all of Dr Wilhelm Reich's books, and we saw them every time we saw Bruce Lee practice Shaolin or heard John Coltrane play music.
The light show tonight reminded me that this is where the rubber meets the road when it comes to DOING art. I could write (and have written) tomes about the music and the sacred spirit that electrifies everyone around me when my gift is active. But this awareness, the ability to see the often unseen, and to fully believe in its reality, is a clear and focused way of describing the glory and grace of spontaneous improvisation amid a journey shared and shaped by many people. That I facilitated the journey is almost secondary.
The power behind all art is the power to elicit emotion.
Emotion is the life force. Without passion, no one goes anywhere. No sparks fly (on the dog, even!) and no blue flames are visible on the hands in the dark. Emotionally blocked people have a hard time seeing the waves and turbulence even on the very brightest sunny day.
Emotionally open people see it from childhood, and, whether they understand it or not, are blessed to spend their lives surrounded by Orgone and chi.
The universe is a magical place.
It will not be easily described by science.
It must be described by women and men and children full of the streaming life force, able to love and be loved, able to experience and immerse themselves in bodily love. I believed this long before I read Dr Reich. I still believe it.
"Subjective light phenomenon" do exist, and they are common. Eyeballs aren't forever, and floaters, lightning effects, and spots before the eyes are common, particularly when we're tired. But sparks on the dog... sparks I can watch jump around playfully... it's like watching the Creator of the Universe to me, because that's what I believe it is.
I'm not sure about a lot of things, but I AM sure that we're not as smart and all-knowing as some of us think we are. I think the wonders go on and on and on. I think it's SO deep and powerful and amazing that, if faced with the full TRUTH of life in the universe, we might just drool and cry and say, as Jodie Foster did in the wonderful movie Contact: "I had NO idea. It's so beautiful! I had... no... idea!"